Just Following Orders? Nae Excuse!

I have recently received a copy of an email sent by Stevieboy last July.  The member who passed it along assumed that we had already seen it.  Not so.  If others have relevant information that we have not mentioned, please let us know.

When converted to the database time, the email was received at 07:47 am Monday July 19, 2010.

Dear friends, 

I have been asked by Tink to inform you of the situation as it stands right now on the Forum. 
As you might be aware by now, Carlos (Kalua) has resigned as Admin of the site, effective immediately and I and Ross Manarchy (waldog) have also resigned. This is in response to the behaviour by dyebat and Lchris and what is perceived to be an attempt to undermine the Staff. We are also under sustained attack by those member of DJFG's site, who are conspiring to destroy the forum, something they have been trying to do now for many months, even before the recent auction. 

If you wish the bulk of the remaining Staff to remain, then you are requested to say this in the strongest possible terms, for as it stands at the moment, the entire Staff is about to resign en masse.

Thank you,
Graeme

PS Please pass this message on to your friends on the forum, the ones that you can trust!

Tink asked Stevieboy to send the email, so it can be reasonably assumed that she knew what he would say.  I believe that this email further implicates Pickled Tink as one of those coordinating the events of July 2010.

Stevieboy claimed that Dyebat and lchris were trying to undermine staff, but as we have shown, they did no such thing.  They had always expected staff to be in charge, and asked them to return. 

So why had the rumour that Dyebat and lchris wanted to undermine staff been passed around?  Most likely it was the result of their questioning of Kalua’s excessive need for secrecy.  He had refused to provide any identification at all, even though he was to be Director of the Board.  If Dyebat and lchris insisted on it, they had to be discredited.

Stevieboy claimed that the site was “under sustained attack” from DJG members.  We now know that the “sustained attack” had nothing to do with DJG and was done by JudyOkla and Danileo.  But who told Stevieboy that it was the DJGers?

Stevieboy also said that the ”entire Staff is about to resign en masse”.  He asked for members to say if they wanted the staff to remain “in the strongest possible terms”.  This is further confirmation of the ploy by staff to walk out and orchestrate the membership to demand their return.

It is clear that the events of July 18th were coordinated by the several staff members.

It is possible that some of the staff members were unaware that it was a sham and were used by others.  Stevieboy had been trusted by the membership of the forum.  If he knew that that the whole thing was a set-up, it was a betrayal of the forum members.  If he did not know about the activities of JudyOkla and Danileo, it is especially unfortunate that he would be used in this way to spread disinformation.

Facts Are Stubborn Things.

I have prepared a synopsis/summary of relevant points as some readers told us that it would be helpful.  This is the story so far:

No former members were unbanned on July 18th.

No banned members were approved, contrary to the comments made by Pickled Tink in the Board report.

False rumours of forum takeover were spread by staff including LonniR, Waldog and Truus. The cybertroll known as Orgonon/Mark Conner/Walkerd/willson/MaryAnn (et al) was in direct contact with most staff members and told them lies which they believed and acted upon.

LonniR rallied support by perpetuating the lies among certain members.

JudyOkla and Danileo created at least six false identities and attempted to give them Admin powers. They were partially successful. They altered records to hide when the false member accounts were created and when they were given Admin powers.

A new member account was created which Lonnirose used in the name of larryF. This account information was also altered to make it appear that 'he' had joined the forum in 2009. LonniR used this account solely to spread misinformation.

EvaMarie/Danileo logged on to the forum as an Admin. After JudyOkla and Danileo announced their resignations and had apparently left, they continued to work in the Admin Control Panel under false names. EvaMarie/Danileo returned with the same user account, but using two different proxies. A proxy is a way of disguising identity and location when online.  One of these proxies gave a UK location as described in my previous blog.

 

Stay tuned!  Watch this space.....

*Title credited to John Adams.

The Smear Machine

Character assassination is at once easier and surer than physical assault; and it involves far less risk for the assassin. It leaves him free to commit the same deed over and over again, and may, indeed, win him the honors of a hero in the country of his victims. (Alan Barth)

On 5th August last year, just three weeks after the events of July 18th - 21st, there was a contrived effort on the part of staff and certain 'key players' of SBFII to 'move on' despite the fact that nothing had been resolved as far as determining who had created so much confusion on the forum.  The voices of those who had posted most accusingly in July were heard loudest in August, whilst those members whose names had been smeared were equally as determined that they would not allow the matter to be merely swept under the carpet.  Despite the fact that the party line was to move on, with the general understanding that mistakes had been made on all sides, posts continued to be made by staff members that were inflammatory and that belied acceptance of that premise.  Here is one such example.

LonniR posted the following in a thread started by Pickled Tink entitled, 'Debunking Rumours':

"...Neither Tink nor I resigned until after the hacking and 3 of the new mods never did. That night all the mods were suddently and without warning stripped of our accesses. For a while there we did not know why or what had happened, and then realized we were being inundated with banned members on the forum and were powerless to stop them. I later understood we were locked out for security reasons, but at the time it was as though we had all been fired without notice. It was a very trying situation for everyone involved, but it's all been resolved now and we can move on.

At the time of the July incident, members could join the forum provisionally, subject to moderator approval. No banned members were approved during that period, yet LonniR still perpetuated the rumour and exaggerated the run of events.  Inundated? As a moderator she would have been aware that only three former members had joined, and that none had been approved. 

LonniR claimed that it had 'all been resolved' last August, but had anything been resolved?  Had members discovered the truth about what happened?  Was any retraction made by the Staff or Board of Directors of SBFII regarding the ludicrous claim that 'the DJGers' had planned to take over the forum?  No. The facts had not been uncovered.

Is the truth of what happened then worth any less today than it was then? 

Despite the apparent effort on the part of Staff to persuade members to 'move on', beyond the July events, permission was granted by management to CanadianBill to attack members of another Susan Boyle Fan Site, in the form of his thread entitled "Some Urgent Questions For All".  This information was given to him by Mark Conner/Orgonon (aka the cyber stalker bully.) 

Was the sanctioning of this thread conducive to 'moving on''? 

Now Paulie's forum members and I had become victims of the SBFII smear machine.  The attack against me, personally, was scathing.

The smear machine is the opus operandi by which several members and former members of SBFII (formerly susan-boyle.com) had their characters assassinated either actively or by passive resistance of the administrators.  

The cyber-troll promoted the notion that several forum members, who had had the good fortune to attend Susan's performances several times were stalkers. No firm statement was made to deny or counteract those  allegations by the administrators at SBFII.  Not only were those allegations not denied; they were in at least in one case passed along by Pickled Tink! There is not a shadow of doubt in my mind that the rebuttals should have been immediate and unambiguous.  No such  support was forthcoming from the administration and so these good peoples' names were smeared.  Why?

At the time of the trouble last summer, Danileo inappropriately used her professional nursing experience to lend credibility to her false claim that Dyebat was suffering from dementia.  This unsubstantiated, incorrect and damning diagnosis was perpetuated by Mirrim, and others.  

It was, obviously, a total fabrication that was both erroneous and malicious.

JudyOkla also started making none too subtle references to lchris's state of mind, feigning concern for her well-being within the community.  Every effort was made to suggest that lchris's judgement was impaired through lack of sleep and overwork.  Nothing could have been further from the truth.

Whilst outwardly the impression of 'moving forward together' was promoted by the staff, a very different story was being played out behind the scenes.  The cyber-stalker was still in communication with staff and certain members. He was still believed, despite the fact that the staff themselves recognised him as the pest they had banned on many previous occasions.  Why?

In matters of truth and justice, there is no difference between large and small problems, for issues concerning the treatment of people are all the same. (Albert Einstein)

The Beginning of the End

Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning. (Winston Churchill)

It has been eight months since the events of last July set us on our present path.  Establishing the truth has involved a long period of examination and analysis.  We might have been able to publish our findings a little earlier but we have experienced illness, surgery and other real life situations which took priority.

lChris, dyebat and I have been lied about publicly in particularly vicious ways.  I have been a victim of malicious communication by CB, approved by SBFII staff, and so it is of particular importance to me to make it a matter of public record that this was done without foundation.

For four months we put our faith in the Board of Directors of (the now) SBFII and took them at their word when they promised a full investigation as to what had taken place.

When, after months the promised report failed to appear, Knudt, lChris & Dyebat and I started to blog, in order to bring the truth to light by putting pressure on the Board to have a full examination of the forum record and the results made public. Our actions did appear to have some effect.

A report from the Board of Directors was finally posted in mid November but it became apparent that no thorough investigation had been taken, and that no honest disclosure would be forthcoming.

So we continued with our own investigation.  We examined relevant threads from the July period, establishing a time-line and converting times for data into EST, which is 'forum time'. We continued to blog and to continue to try to clear our names.

By December, it became quite obvious that the administrators at SBFII were not prepared to bring the truth to light and so I made the decision to resign.  So did lChris and dyebat. Knudt did not resign, but was (soon) banned.

It was at this point that dyebat decided that knudt and I could be handed some of the Hostgator records (for the period during which she had been the owner) to carry out a thorough investigation.

In January we received the first part of the database. We then had to learn how to read, search, analyse and interpret it.  We sometimes had to search in several places to find the truth, when attempts had been made to cover it up.  

We received more of the database in March. The pieces of the puzzle began to come together at last.  Despite the delay and the length of the journey to truth, I am able to confirm that we did get definitive answers. We are now posting our findings.

It is regrettable that those responsible for the events of July 18th - 21st did not step forward in an honourable way to admit their parts in what happened.  That would have saved a lot of time and further angst from within the community.  

They Had Come to a Time When No-one Dared Speak His Mind......

 “Great is truth, but still greater, from a practical point of view, is silence about truth. By simply not mentioning certain subjects... totalitarian propagandists have influenced opinion much more effectively than they could have by the most eloquent denunciations.” (Aldous Huxley)

Banning knudt was just one part of the new draconian atmosphere at susan-boyle.com.  Now they are treating members cavalierly and breaking their own rules.  They are rewriting history as well as policy.  They have deleted many threads, denying members access to part of the forum record.  

There has recently been another example of the administration not treating  a member at the forum in accordance with their own rules. 

Last week a dedicated fan of Susan Boyle, active on several forums, felt she had no option but to write to the administrators of susan-boyle.com.

These words touched me, because they summarise very eloquently what many of us feel, and so I asked her permission to share them here.

"Pickled Tink and Kalua:

In spite of the fact that I've broken no rules of this forum, not one, not once, and in spite of the fact that I've never been given a warning of any kind, last night I was designated "pre-moderation." I don't even know what that means, but I'm guessing it amounts to a seat in the back row of the Naughty Corner.

In every single post I've made here since this forum was a blog, I've been civil and respectful when speaking my mind. My posts have never been capricious or frivolous. Last night I asked a question because I really wanted to know. My question went unanswered, and my post was deleted, and my name was removed from your list of members. You have violated your own procedures and treated me rudely, without so much as a PM to tell me why.

The legion of your former members, the banned, the damned, and the disgusted are beginning to outnumber you. Your ever-expanding rules and definitions are a lexicon of restrictions, warnings, and punishments. It's way too tedious and banana republic for me. I've been a grownup for quite a while now, and I have no desire to be "pre-moderated" and sent to the Naughty Corner by a couple of paranoid control freaks, who are bent upon squeezing the life out of what once was a very nice place.

Please delete my account.

Sincerely,
Skywriter

Has the forum, as George Orwell wrote, come to a time when no one dared speak his mind?  What are members to think when someone can be punished for simply asking a question?

Renaissance

For the first time since mid July I can write with a feeling of optimism. That feeling has been hard-won.

 

I put everything I had into trying to bring about reintegration of members at susan-boyle.com. After the Board report I did everything I could to illustrate the parody of democracy that I saw enacted there.  I could not 'go gently into that dark night' as Board members seemed able to do.

'Divide and Conquer' is a very effective tactic to maintain control of people.  It is one I have found is not only employed by cyber stalker trolls.  Truth is usually the first casualty, and secrecy and paranoia can make fools of us all.

This year has been gruelling; my personal annus horribilis. It  demanded so much energy, that once I could no longer see any resolution there, I took the decision to resign.  I can honestly say, I have not looked back since.

Not everything has been negative of course.  One wonderful thing that has happened since July is that people have shown their true colours and many have had the courage to nail those colours to the mast. Several members I had found myself head to head with in the past I am now honoured to call friend.  It became obvious as time passed, that the empathy we felt against injustice far outweighed other matters.  We got to know each other better...

If fans could not be reunited from across the Susan Boyle community via the forum at susan-boyle.com, could it happen somewhere else?  Could there be a Renaissance of our community as a whole? Some lateral thinking was called for.....

Lchris offered to help knudt and I set up a new forum where everyone was welcome. Somewhere where everyone is treated with the same courtesy and is subject to the same (few) rules, applied transparently.

It is with great pleasure (and a little trepidation) that I can tell you that a new forum has been put in place where each and every one of you is welcome.  All we ask is that you do not come 'in disguise' and treat each other and the forum kindly.

We extend a warm welcome to you all at Susan Boyle Fans and we look forward to seeing you there.

Long Walk to Freedom

We should put the spin-doctors in spin clinics, where they can meet other spin patients and be treated by spin consultants. The rest of us can get on with the proper democratic process.

Benn,Tony (Anthony Neil Wedgwood)
In The Independent,'Quote Unquote', 25 Oct.

It is said that a year is a long time in politics.

That being accepted, eighteen months in the Susan Boyle community can seem like a lifetime.

Since April 11th 2009, I think I can truly say I have experienced the full range of emotions several times over; from exhilaration, to the depths of despair.

When I first heard Susan sing, I experienced what everyone else on the forums describe.  Her audition tape still has the same effect.  Nothing has diminished.  I don't think it ever will.

I had never joined a forum before, let alone a fan forum, and in the beginning I felt awkward and quite shy.  I lurked for a number of weeks before summoning up the courage to join susan-boyle.com.  It took me almost as long to make my first post, and when I did I felt like a school kid sitting an examination.  I still remember the wave of relief when someone did actually reply to my post.

I soon made friendships, several of which I'm sure will endure. 'Virtual' friends became flesh and blood as we discovered the joy of Skype and could hear each other's voices.  We laughed, cried and celebrated Susan Boyle together and it was wonderful!

At times it seemed too good to last, and of course, it was.  

The community became splintered quite early in the history of the forum and it appears to me that some opportunists used that to forward their own agendas.

On numerous occasions I have had my words twisted around to mean something entirely different to what I intended.  Two individuals were particularly good at this.  One was the cyber bully; the other was Pickled Tink.  

A brazen example of this was illustrated in the Board report.  Not only did PT knowingly lie about my actions, but she manipulated my own words to make her lie seem more plausible.

When words are spun repeatedly, changing the characterisation and context of what was said, it may be clever, but it is not commendable.  It creates a pattern of deception.

I could have expected no better from the cyber troll, but I certainly expected better from Pickled Tink. I have only one message for her.  Nietzsche said it well,

“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you”

And that is why I can never go back to susan-boyle.com.  It truly has been a very long walk to freedom....

Smoke and Mirrors

Smoke and mirrors is a metaphor for a deceptive, fraudulent or insubstantial explanation or description. The source of the name is based on magicians' illusions, where magicians make objects appear or disappear by extending or retracting mirrors amid a confusing burst of smoke. The expression may have a connotation of virtuosity or cleverness in carrying out such a deception. (Wikipedia)

Tonight the Board of SBFII meets again.  I see that a 'correction' has been made to the report of November 14th. It was done quietly yesterday afternoon.  In fact, had I not looked myself I would have had no idea this had happened. Nevertheless, I am grateful for the amendment.   My time travel days are over. I hope we get no more 'smoke and mirrors' from tonight's meeting.

To get the right answers, one has first to ask the right questions...

The Board's 'independent' investigation into the events of July 18th failed to ask the right questions of the expert.  

The 'Independent' investigation promised to members was to be conducted by someone not involved directly with current Staff or Board Members. It was moved (unknown to members and lchris/dyebat) to be conducted at the home of the Director of the Board by a friend/neighbour of her son.

All seven members of the Board approved this. All seven members of the Board presented this report to members as their 'Independent' investigation. What is untenable is the fact that two (staff) Board members signed the original report dated November 14th even though they knew it contained statements that were at best misleading.  How on earth could this have happened?  Are they not aware of the weight such a statement carries?

From the official report of that investigation the investigator was asked to "examine the data base to see if there was any evidence of hacking, or interference and to comment upon the database errors which we were and are continuing to experience."

Had this been a genuinely neutral investigation all involved should have been asked a few questions in order to piece together the chronology. Neither Xeno, lchris, dyebat or I were ever asked any questions by the investigator. lchris collected data throughout, yet no one asked for it.  The findings would have been very different had this happened.

But sometimes it pays to ask people the wrong questions so you can make the outcome appear to be suitable for your purposes.

I want to give credit to two technical analysts on the forum who, after the events of July 18th, came to lchris and apologised unreservedly for their part in the confusion that night. They told Chris they had created two admin accounts because they genuinely believed that the forum was under attack (by the faction named by the cyber stalker bully.)  They had been unable to grant super-admin powers to those accounts, but their logic at that time had been perfectly rational.  Was it any wonder they were led to believe that the attack was genuine, when another staff member had issued a call to arms earlier that day?

It was by working with certain staff members, and others, that the cyber stalker was so successful.  He did not have to repeat his deceptions; the 'team' did it for him.  That gave his lies far more credence.

What I find extremely difficult to come to terms with is the assertion that those two new admin accounts were created as 'redundancy' (safeguards).  It makes no sense that two experienced technical officers should practise a fire drill if they thought the building was genuinely on fire!  The truth, on the other hand, makes perfect sense.  If those two accounts were authorised, they were authorised retrospectively; not on July 18th/19th.

But I still find it incredulous that the report also laid the effect of the troll's influence firmly at our door.  By 'our' I mean lchris, dyebat and me.

I really think it is time for people to stand up and 'fess up.

Some of the staff, some Board members, and some of the general members know more of this story and are keeping quiet, allowing innocent people to take the blame. To them I would say, you owe all of us in the Susan Boyle community the truth. We want to move on and forward in unity. You are preventing that. There is no shame in telling the truth.

Food for Thought.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day in The U.S.A.  Americans are enjoying a holiday that is centred around food.  My family and I all have plenty and for that I am thankful.

Although we don't celebrate Thanksgiving here, the thought was enough to make me reflect about what I have to be thankful for this year, and it is a lot.

First of all, I still have my husband.  He was very seriously ill earlier in the year and spent most of the summer in hospital, prior to heart surgery.  Yesterday he had his 62nd birthday; the birthday that he most likely would not have lived to celebrate.  For that I am thankful.

In times such as these, you begin to realise who your real friends are.  I have been blessed this year with the support of friends of long standing and that of friends whom I have never actually met, but who could not have done more had they been family.  For all of them, I am thankful.

During the last year, in times of great trouble, I have laughed with people and cried with them.  I have found myself totally supportive of forum members with whom I have been at odds in the past, and at odds with those I had thought friends.  It has been a year of enlightenment; for that I am thankful.

I was blessed (or cursed) with an enquiring mind.  I have always questioned things that made no sense to me and that has not always made life easier.  Nevertheless, in 57 years it has taught me one thing, and that is, it is better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot.  For that life lesson I am thankful.

I have been accused of many things during the past year, from being a time traveller to a dangerous international cyber-hacker.  Unfortunately time is linear and my level of computer skills would make the average 14-year old laugh.   Although a few people have dropped me from their friends lists, blocked me from following them on twitter and even attacked me personally and publicly, I have to remember that there are also those who have gone out of their way to send me a kind word or message of support.  For those individuals I am thankful.

This last year has been stressful and difficult for a number of reasons. I am grateful that I have come through it intact.  I could not have done so without conviction.  When I look at myself in the mirror, my conscience is clear.  For that I am thankful.

Thank you to my American friends, for reminding me that I have so very much to be thankful for.

A Lingering Sense of Injustice

To know what is right and not do it is the worst cowardice.  ~Confucius

Why did I start a blog?

Imagine that one day you find yourself accused of something of which you are entirely innocent.  It is not just repeated in private.  It is posted in a thread on the forum.  The claims are outrageous and very damaging. Many people around you believe the lies  because they 'originated' from someone well respected.

You can tell from the attitude of others that the lies are believed, but no-one actually asks you if the allegations are true!  You go immediately to the person who posted those lies and you have lengthy correspondence in which you do your best to explain the truth, all to no avail.  Your accuser concedes one or two points but claims that, should he apologise, he would feel it necessary to resign from the forum, even though you insist that you would never consider that necessary.  You even go so far as to say that you would publicly ask him to rescind his resignation if he felt obliged to offer it, but even that fails to move him.

You go to administrators next, who by this time acknowledge that the information was given to the OP by someone they have banned many times before.  But when you try to insist upon a retraction, you are told that they have no authority to issue one.  They know the truth, but act to remove the offending thread only after the threat of litigation.

Imagine then that you receive a screen capture of a PM from someone who has also been concerned about the thread and who has contacted the OP directly to ask if he had been given authority to post it.  The contents of the thread do directly contradict the rules of the forum after all!  That screen capture shows quite clearly the OP admitting that he had received permission from 'administration' to go ahead and post it.  It tells me that he had a mandate to do it!

In the meantime, your friends, who know the truth as well as you do yourself, witness your distress.  They learn of your endeavours to clear your name and, as months pass, your frustration becomes theirs as well....

They try to help in the only way they know how, because they are the only people who know the truth. They try to raise the matter on the forum, when the moment seems appropriate, but of course they are dismissed as 'the same few people' each time.

You decide to write to the Board.  In order that the matter is not overlooked you write to each member of the Board, including the Chairperson and Vice Chairman.  You request read-receipts for the PMs and one by one they come back to you.  You allow yourself to feel a little more optimistic.  Surely now, someone will act.  Some three weeks later you get an acknowledgement from the Chairperson of the Board telling you that the matter will be discussed at the next Board meeting, and so you wait...and wait....and wait.....

Eventually a short message from the Board is posted. Within it is incorporated something that resembles a blanket apology because it refers to 'perceived slights'.  Your heart sinks.

Your friends, of course, also see what is happening. They see your distress but feel impotent to help; they cannot ease your pain, because they are not responsible for it. Their sense of injustice is now so intense that they begin to raise the matter again, in the threads on the forum.  After all, their names were blackened along with yours, in the morass of lies that have been told about you.

Moderators and administrators get further enraged because they cannot keep the lid on 'these same people' who keep coming back and causing ‘trouble’.  Of course we follow the wonderful news about Susan and participate on the forum.  But our enjoyment of these things is tainted by the lingering residue of injustice.  Surely there must be someone who will listen to the truth we think, so we keep trying…

Then, in an act worthy of Stalin or Pinochet, a list of edicts is put into force from the Board; no. 6 is is custom-made, or so it seems:

6. The board has taken the view that there are a small number of members who post only on contentious matters, and who rarely if ever post about Susan . They come to the forum only to resurrect past issues. The board will direct the staff to delete any posts which continue to disrupt the forum in this manner, and if necessary to terminate the membership of habitual offenders.

You have borne this all for four months now.  During that time certain 'facts' have become established in many peoples' minds, and you have tried your best to ignore the many snarky comments aimed in your direction along the way.  But deep in your heart you know you have to clear your name.

So, after every door is shut in your face and every other avenue blocked, you do what I am doing now; you put the facts - the truth - in a blog and then you tweet it a couple of times to do your best to ensure that the people who read the lies, also have the chance to read the truth.

So that is why I have started this blog.  Even though my nature is to negotiate and reason, I felt I had exhausted every channel by conventional means to overcome the problem with diplomacy.  After other doors were closed to me, it became my best option for getting my story out.

With Open Eyes and a True Heart

On a day when we are celebrating Susan's phenomenal record-breaking success, I want to acknowledge her latest achievements here in this blog.  We must never lose sight of what drew us together in the first place.

• Susan Boyle has become the first female artist ever to hold, simultaneously, both the US and UK No1 spots twice in less than 12 months.  What an incredible achievement!

• With her albums - last year's I Dreamed A Dream and  newly released The Gift, Susan is one of only three acts to have ever accomplished this - the others being The Monkees in 1967 and The Beatles in 1969. 

• The Gift has also been named the fastest-selling holiday album ever!  Susan just keeps on raising the bar...

Love and congratulations to you Susan!  No-one deserves these accolades more than you.  And there's more to come - WOW!

Tonight I also want to re-post an apology I made on November 1st.  It was on a thread at the forum that was quickly closed, so probably not many members saw it. Here is a link for members: Post #6

For those unable to access the forum, these are my words,

I would hate what happened to me to mar the bigger picture.

Whilst I am completely innocent of the crimes the cyber stalker implied, I said some foolish and unwise things in anger on what should have been (and used to be) a completely closed forum among what I thought were friends. In other words I 'vented'. That was almost 10 months ago now, but nothing 'disappears' in cyber space. Our kind words and sentiments are completely overshadowed by moments of anger. Even benign comments can be taken out of context.

Of course, several people have brought screen caps here and members of this forum have subsequently been hurt. For that I apologise unreservedly, because they were not intended to do that. My words were never intended to be witnessed outside of the circle I once belonged to. I can even see now that some of the things I genuinely believed to be true were lies perpetrated initially by our cyber-stalker troll. I can only hope that I am older and wiser now....

Bullying and stalking can take many, many forms. No-one must ever, ever, be afraid to report anything they feel goes beyond their comfort zone, either online or in real life. Each time we hesitate, another bully wins.

The current situation has been difficult for everyone.  Board members, I feel, have a particularly difficult task.  They can only work from what is presented to them, and hopefully learn to ask the right questions.

My best hope has always been that they undertake their responsibilities with open eyes and a true heart. We can neither ask, nor expect, any more from them.